Celebrating Autism!
Our son Ethan (9) is blessed with a collection of letters
after his name…ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) and
ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). So,
today, I am celebrating Autism and the beautiful things
that it brings to our life as a family.
Autism is a neuro-developmental disorder. Ethan’s brain
is wired differently to yours and mine and probably was
so from birth. The exact cause of this is still being
universally investigated, but probably a combination of
genetic and environmental factors contribute to the
disorder. More than half a million people in the UK have
Autism, around 1 in 100. And Ethan has joined quite a hall of fame:
Stephen Spielberg, Bill Gates, Einstein to name a few. (With his ADHD he
will proudly tell you that he joins the same club as Leonardo da Vinci,
Alexander Graham Bell and Will.i.am!!) There are a host of other famous
names to add to both these lists.
All children with ASD share three main areas of difficulty although it affects
each child in unique and different ways. These difficulties affect the
child’s thinking, talking and the way he interacts socially.
If you analyse a conversation with Ethan you will soon realise
that first and foremost his conversation is about…Ethan! Oh,
and Ethan’s interests! Match this up with another ASD trait,
obsessions, and endless dialogue about Spongebob or Lego can
ensue. The other day, he asked me what I was knitting. This
was cause for celebration as he rarely verbalises an interest in what others
are doing just to make conversation. When he was 4, prior to diagnosis, he
was referred to Speech Therapy because his speech was so unclear. Actually
he was just speaking incredibly quickly because his brain has so much going
on all the time and he was tripping over his words to get it all out there.
For Ethan, life is very literal. Everyday sayings that we take for granted
have to be explained to him, otherwise he would be looking out the window
for rain clouds spilling cats and dogs. This black and whiteness means he
says it like it is. If you have a spot on your nose, Ethan will tell you about it,
just in case you hadn’t noticed. And he will be completely unaware of any
effect his comments have on you! Ethan has caused offence by
commenting on people’s size and colour. He is not judging or being unkind,
or even rude, just telling it as it is. We are doing our best to teach him how
these comments can make a person feel.
Living with Ethan is sometimes very challenging. He is the sweetest child
and also in his frustration he is quite an aggressive child, full of deepest
remorse after a hurtful outburst. To those who meet him out and about, in
their home, at church, on the street, I think he probably comes across as a
funny, friendly, slightly quirky young fella with a huge amount of energy. I’m
not sure any more because we have just gotten so used to him being who
he is. From strangers (and people we know) we see tuts and shaking of the
heads, brought about by his hyperactivity usually, but by those close to us
who really know him, he is very loved and that love for him we truly
appreciate. Thank you.
So, that’s the awareness bit over and done with. On to celebration!
Ethan is fun and funny. He is physically strong and energetic. He has an
incredible memory and a super quick brain for learning stuff. He is able to
learn concepts and put them into context while I’m trying to keep up with
the initial explanation. He can construct a Lego set in no time at all and
plays strategy and logic games annoyingly well. He loves stories and
characters. He loves to snuggle with me and a good book at bed time and
(because he lacks the sleep chemical melatonin) finds it incredibly difficult
to go over to sleep on his own. But hey, what an excuse for longer snuggles!
He brings noise to our home. Lots of it. Mostly laughter, singing and of
course those endless movie dialogues. He has inspiring determination and
one of his favourite words is ‘perseverance’. He has very few real friends
(because most ‘normal’ children think he’s weird) but to those few friends
he has, he is intensely loyal and loving!
ASD does not make Ethan who he is. Neither does ADHD. He is unique and
destined to be who he is, created by The Creator who knows every hair on
Ethan’s head and every thought in his oh, so busy mind. In our church, we
have a tradition that on the day a baby is dedicated, a candle is given to the
family. We light Ethan’s candle every birthday to remind ourselves of that
dedication day. Ethan’s candle is quite unusual. It’s like three plaited cords
of wax, woven together in the colours blue, red and yellow. We, and Ethan’s
Godmother who chose that candle, had no idea that those colours, in jigsaw
pieces, would represent the very condition that he has. But our heavenly
Father who gave us the honour and joy of being Ethan’s parents; He knew.
Kathryn Fyfe
© Writersreign.co.uk - all rights reserved